Helping divorced and widowed women in their second half of life move forward with resilience, vitality and a positive sense of self

Roberta Taylor

Roberta Taylor
Coach for Divorced and Widowed Women

Decision Making When You’re Suddenly Single

Decision Making When You’re Suddenly Single

You’re divorced or widowed facing decisions that used to be shared. Even smart, independent women like you may have depended on their spouses when it came to finances, buying a new car or where to vacation.

But you’re on your own now making decisions that affect your life. Going from “we” to “me” is an emotional shift that can be scary. But it’s also an opportunity for learning and growth. How can you make decisions that will enhance your single life?

Three Tips for decision making with confidence

1. Give yourself time

Getting divorced or being widowed is a major life transition. It’s an emotional time of grief with confusing and conflicting feelings.
You owe it to yourself to wait before rushing into life changing decisions like re-locating, starting a new career or starting a new relationship.

Going from “we” to “me” is an emotional shift that can be scary. But it’s also an opportunity for learning and growth.

Get to know who you are as a single woman. Discover what you need and what you want now that you’re on your own.

2. Information is empowering

Reliable information is essential for making good decisions. Whether you’re buying a new car or thinking about selling your home,
information and learning will help you consider what’s right for you.

Go on line and do your homework. Talk with women who have been there. Read articles and books. Find a community group or an
organization like The Transition Network that connects women who are navigating major life transitions. You’ll feel better informed and less
alone.

3. Trust yourself

And then there’s that quiet voice inside, your intuition. The one that nudges you when something is off. It’s a hunch, a gut feeling. It’s your inner wisdom. Practice listening for that inner voice. Learn to trust it. It rarely steers you wrong. Sometimes the answers come not through logic but through your body and your senses.

Getting in Touch with Your Inner Wisdom

Give yourself 5 minutes for this simple exercise.

Sit in a comfortable chair and close your eyes. Take a few deep breaths to quiet your mind and rest your body. Notice how your body feels.

Think about a decision that you’re dealing with. What are the pros and cons? What do you really want? What’s getting in the way?

Tune into your body and listen for what your wise voice is telling you.

It’s time to trust your wisdom and ability to enhance your life through decisions you make. Make time each day to listen to the wisdom of your body.

  • What needs to change in your life?
  • What’s out of balance?
  • What choices do you need to make to have what you really want in your life?

You don’t have to do it alone. Asking for support is how you learn.

Check to see if there is a TTN chapter in your area. www.thetransitionnetwork.org.

I would love to hear about what helps you make decisions.

How does your internal wisdom help you when you’re feeling stuck?

Sharing your insights and experience makes you a teacher for others.

Please share with women in your network who could benefit from the information in my blog.

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